You know how back in the day people used to name their estate? Like Monticello, Gray Gardens, Menopause Manor, Peyton Place, Graceland? Well, you might not know this, but my own humble estate has a name, too.
I call my crib Villa Sinvergüenza, which basically means “house without shame” in Spanish. Why? Because it was purchased with the money I earned doing stuff other people might consider shameful — toe sucking, ball-kicking, donut-eating, twat-flashing…etc.
I am a deeply moral person, and don’t consider any of the above activities to be “wrong,” or anything to be ashamed of. Hence, this blog…and thus also the name Villa Sinvergüenza. I used my “ill-gotten” earnings to buy the place, and I use the same ill-gotten earnings to pay my property taxes and keep up with my home maintenance and repairs. I’m a good neighbor, and a good citizen. Ain’t no shame in that!
Anyway, what I need is a little plaque to hang on the wall next to my front door, letting visitors know what’s up. Just think of all the Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormon missionaries and homeless beggars I could fend off with a sign like this!
This is really important, guys. I tried to paint my own sign, but I overestimated my artistic ability, and it came out totally crappy. So I’m putting it out here: if any of you are sign painters/carpenters/craftsmen and can hook a sister up…let me know!
I only have a budget of about $50 for this thing, which is why I’m reaching out for help. The site I used to create the above example (danthoniadesigns.com) is trying to charge me $145 for my design, and it’s only 12″ long by 5.5″ tall!!
So…if anyone can help, let me know. I’ll gladly pay you in toe sucking, ball-kicking, donut-eating, or twat-flashing 🙂