My Vagina

vag 225x300 My Vagina

thar she be

Does the title of this post make you uncomfortable? How about the photo?

I bet the answer to both is “yes,” and that’s part of what’s wrong with this fucked-up society. Neither the photo, nor the word “vagina,” are overtly sexual…but because the subject is pussy, people freak out. WHY?

(Note: if you’re freaked out by the photo because it’s bald, you have a semi-valid concern. The fact that I shaved it (for a body paint session) DOES kinda make it pedophilic-creepy. But I’m well over 18, and it’s still just skin.)

I’m as guilty of this as anyone. As a nude model, I have what we in the industry call “limitations:” on my Model Mayhem portfolio, I state that I am willing to shoot anything up to “Playboy-style” nudes — which basically means closed-leg, as opposed to “Hustler-style” open-leg shots.

Why??

I consider myself a real free-thinking bohemian-type — what’s so bad about nudity, nipples, etc.? I’m comfortable running around naked all day, every day…but if a photographer wants to photograph my vag, I freak out. It seems like an invasion of a very “private” area.

vag rainbow 225x300 My Vagina

taste the rainbow

But WHY? What is so fucking private about the vagina? If someone wanted me to open my mouth as wide as possible, to photograph my uvula and tonsils, I’d have no qualms. What’s so magical about the vagina?

To me, it’s just a fount of piss, blood and unpleasant secretions — the most unpleasant of which potentially being the mucous-covered head of a crowning fetus (a catastrophe miracle which, thankfully, has never been visited upon my particular vagina) (yet). But the vagina seems to symbolize a lot more for many people.

To wit: despite the clearly-stated limitations on my Model Mayhem profile, photographers are always trying to get me to SHOW MORE VAGINA. It’s like a fucked-up game with some of these guys, and sometimes it gets so exhausting/tiresome that I give in, in the interest of getting the fucking shoot over with faster: OK fine, have at it. You wanna see some pussy? Here ya go, motherfucker. It’s a relief in a lot of ways — I can stop sucking in my gut, pointing my toes and smiling, and just flop back without having to worry about my facial expression or anything else — because you know they’re already in Macro mode, with no time for anything above the 33rd parallel. It’s easy!!

I finally had enough of this cat-and-mouse and amended my Model Mayhem bio to read as follows:

“…if you REALLY want to photograph my labia minora and other innards, be advised that my rate for clinical, up-close spread vag shots is $700/hour. So go ahead; bust out your most powerful telephoto lens, jeweler’s loupe, what-the-fuck-EVER, and blast away! I’ve been told I do have a very shapely vagina smile My Vagina For $700, you too could have 60 wondrous minutes of staring at/photographing it. Although why you would want to, I have no idea! “

obey 225x300 My Vagina

apologies to Shepard Fairey

I got the idea from a stripper I once I knew, who told me that some Japanese guy once paid her $5,000 (or some ridiculous sum of money) to simply stare at her vagina up-close, like within a couple of inches, for an hour. Are men really that fascinated by the vagina? Apparently so! Do you guys want to crawl back in, or what?

Alas, however, since modifying my MM bio I haven’t had any takers. Maybe it’s because the pervy photographers on there are too cheap; or maybe they’re just not as interested as I thought. Or maybe they think I’m being facetious. But the truth is, I’m serious!

I will gladly lay down and let you photograph my vagina for an hour — labia majora, minora, clitoral glans, urethra…ALL of it! As long as you don’t touch it/poke anything in it/harass it, I’m fine (I will part the curtains myself, at your direction, in a strictly clinical fashion.

annie sprinkle 300x198 My VaginaMy reasons for doing this are manifold; first, I’d genuinely like to clear up some of the bullshit mystique surrounding La Vagine. Keeping shit under wraps is what leads to all kinds of retarded superstitions — nothing kills bullshit like the blasting rays of the mid-day sun.  In this, I’m inspired by Annie Sprinkle and her “Public Cervix Announcement,” a performance art piece in which she lay back and spread open her vagina with a speculum, then let all comers have a look inside (Google it; it’s awesome). (And will ya check out the expressions and body language on the men looking at her…priceless!)

outsidefem 289x300 My Vagina

scarleteen.com

Second, I’d like to make a buck. If I can get anyone to pay me $700 for one hour, that would be awesome. I hereby solemnly swear to donate $100 of any such bookings to Planned Parenthood [amending my Model Mayhem page to reflect this as we speak]!

Third, I’d like to get over my own vestigial hang-ups regarding having my vagina photographed. If it is, as I say, truly just another body part…then I should have no problem putting it on display, a la Sprinkle. Just not in a dumbass cheesy “Come and plow me, Big Boy!” kind of way…more in a “Here it is, what you always dreamed of: the dank, fleshy portal to my uterus.”

Is that a boner-killer? Sorry!

 

 

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About wonderhussy

I am a foul-mouthed, flat-chested bon vivant and adventuress who likes to curse, drink, smoke and run around nude, and I refuse to kow-tow to the bourgeois moral code of the day. I’ve lived in Vegas over ten years, and have a few stories to tell. I roll around town in a truck stocked with a Breathalyzer and a swizzle stick, a spare pair of panties and two stun guns. Don’t fuck with me!
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12 Responses to My Vagina

  1. Miss Merciless says:

    You know, I have always quoted some unholy amount of money in order to avoid certain activities as a domme. Of course some activities are just out of the question but others that I don’t love can be a lot more tolerable if the price is right. And don’t worry, if someone will pay me $600 to pee on them you’ll find your Mr. Right or Mr. Money to Blow who will take you up on your macro-vag rate.

  2. Jay Horn says:

    Ms. Hussy you have a lovely pussy. Guys always want more – be it high school backseat base running or lapdances. (there is no sex in the champagne room – Chris Rock)

    That having been said, the vagina is a pretty special place – it is where babies come from and boys don’t have one. If I was a male model, I’d be pretty “uptight” if someone insisted on closeups of my gas-hole.

  3. Lee Bartholomew says:

    Oh you should see pjgirls*com smh throw a whisk up there now. And some girls are doing it on their period days. Having lost some of my ring fingertip (at the time Wisconsin eh had a great workers comp. ) Finger went in chain came out hamburger. Blood??? hahahahaha Plastic Surgeon was called. I paid zero and awarded about $1800 in workers comp passed that. Course then I had to have my fingers sewn together for 2 weeks and they tell me don’t pull them apart. Ahem morons I can’t fucking feel them. How am I supposed to know when I’m pulling? (Aug 2000) and I type fast and I lose a fingertip. well today I still type around 90-100 wpm and keyboards hate me. Well Dells especially because they get worn down. (must be because I learned on a typewriter) if I did this on a tablet it’d break. But hey alsscan speculums been around since the dawn of time. Although usually they do it on non period days. Nothing like having a whisk up someones vag on 1080p video and watch the blood drop down. Okay and she’s probably very horny right now which is the only reason she’s got a whisk up there. Although I keep trying to get you and TCRESTANI to show up together on innerdeviant.com he has a talk show type show on youtube. rather popular and sometimes visited by some rather crabby people. Probably not safe for tv. :) search for him on youtube. no i have no idea what he really looks like and he’s big on Back to the Future. But I’m sure if you wanna discuss this interesting Vagina stuff only you can make it interesting. Otherwise yeah watching a video of a model on ALS Scan tell one of the photographers this fetish is weird with the speculum and would she ever date a guy with such a fetish and she answering s big NO. Oh well. :) But mostly because we don’t have one and thats interesting. Besides why can Hot Kinky Jo get other girls to shove up to their elbows their arms up her backside. let alone having a speculum to let people look up there. 1. um does she know what she’s doing to her body 2. OUCH

  4. R ehl says:

    way to much thought and energy given to this stuff. maybe its me but the previous post was exhausting to read, no offense. i dont speak for other guys, so imho… most straight guys loooove to look at nude females, all bits, some more than others depending on one preference and ill bet we are no diff. than a lot of females. its stimulating as hell. The importance someone puts on one body part or another is in that persons mind, it really has no more meaning than that. more or less societal driven, weather or not you chose to believe or not. YOU are challenging that norm, devils advocate in a way and good on you for it. norms are fucking boring. btw – im pretty sure that the guys you see in that speculum pic are not the norm, id like to think most of us have a life. peace wonderhuss

  5. Dan says:

    It seems to me like an absolute honest pussy! I enjoyed looking at it. Thank you for sharing the photo.

  6. Dick A says:

    Neither the title nor the pic makes me uncomfortable. But then again I am from Sweden. ;)

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