This past Saturday I finally got around to exploring a spot I’d always been curious about: Big Dune, about 100 miles northwest of Vegas, just off U.S. 95.
I pass this thing every year on my way to Burning Man, but I’m always so loaded down with costumes and drugs that I don’t want to stop — and on the way back, I’m always too tired.
So I was extra glad when my friend MG (read his blog here) came to town from Phoenix, and proposed an excursion/photo shoot to check it out. As a bonus, I had just finished making my Electric Vagina codpiece, so thought this might be a good opportunity to get some pics in it. It totally was!
It takes about 2 hours to get to Big Dune from Vegas — basically the same as going to the other dunes in the area, Kelso and Dumont. But the drive to Big Dune is super easy — just right up the 95, a few miles past the Alien Brothel Travel Center (the old Cherry Patch Ranch, re-branded to lure in tourists). At the Big Dune sign on the left, you turn off onto a dirt road for the last 5 miles, but it’s a decent road. MG’s SUV was able to take it at 45mph with no problem.
There’s a hard packed dirt area all around the dunes, where people camp out and park their cars (look for the message board as an idea of where to park), but unless you have a quad/sand rail/dune buggy/hardcore 4WD vehicle, you can’t get closer than maybe 1/4 mile to the base of the dunes, or your car will get stuck in the soft sand.
MG and I parked his car on the hard packed area and just hiked in with all our gear. Though it was only mid-February, it was already around 75 degrees, with no shade…and hiking through sand is tough! So be advised, if you want to do a photo shoot here…either bring a quad, or be prepared for a workout.
The other thing to look out for here is people — since Big Dune is fairly convenient to Vegas, lots of rednecks party here. Moreover, there’s no entrance fee (unlike Dumont), so it’s a cheaper class of redneck.
We were there on a Saturday, so there were quite a few people out there….including a whole encampment of Boy Scouts! D’OH!!! One of the scout leaders came over and asked/admonished us to stay away from the boys (since I was nude), so we agreed to hike way out into the dune field and mind our own business. God forbid those little fuckers should see a naked twat, ya know? Meanwhile they’re not allowed to be gay, either. Poor cloistered fuckers.
Wouldn’t you know it, though…despite the fact that we hiked waaaaay out away from their camp, a couple of scouts came snooping around anyway. Oh well — let ‘em get their Merit Badge in Perving! It’s bound to happen sooner or later
Ironically, on our way out at the end of the day, we noticed that the scouts had built a wooden effigy to burn later that night, Burning Man-style. Their leader even told us they were calling it the Burning Scoutmaster!
I thought that was pretty cute.. but also somewhat ironic that a notoriously intolerant organization like the BSA would emulate an all-embracing hippie fuckfest. I hate to tell ya boys, if you wanna play Burning Man, you’re going to have to accept the fact that vaginas and female nipples are a part of life. They won’t do you any harm, they aren’t inherently evil, and the less mystique you impart them, the less complicated and more fun your life will be. That’s the most important Merit Badge of them all!
Anyhoo, if you’re interested in checking out sand dunes near Vegas, Big Dune is a pretty cool place. Although time and distance-wise, if you’re looking to do a photo shoot or just hike around, you might as well just drive to the Kelso Dunes…it’s the same distance, but Kelso doesn’t allow offroad vehicles, so there won’t be any nosy rednecks racing around. (The only downside to the Kelso Dunes is that the roads are slightly worse…but still totally passable in any car.) And I DEFINITELY recommend Big Dune over Dumont — Dumont is always full of rednecks, and has an entrance fee (although it IS where they filmed the original Star Wars…so you might go just for that fact).
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